Get Out of Your Own Way

by Kerry Aguilar | Portland, OR

I walked the Camino in 2023 with three family members. We spent 10 weeks in France and Spain. Along the way, I discovered my biggest obstacle was myself. I would set out in the morning with the mindset that it was going to be a good day. And then it wasn’t. And then it was. I couldn’t make up my mind. 

I was labeled a “loser” when I was 17, which left me lacking confidence that I could do anything well. I felt it was my lot in life to be a failure.

Ten weeks is a long time to spend walking. Much of this time I spent in a one-sided conversation with God. I needed every moment to unravel the one word that had been my scarlet letter for decades. 

As we neared Santiago, a city I had only seen in my dreams, I felt peace. I know I am a lot of things, but “loser” I am not. The loser label had dissolved with each step I took. I replaced it with a mantra: “I can do hard things.”  

The Camino is a gift that keeps on giving. I know I can walk up steep hills and walk down rocky, muddy paths, and even fall down a few times. I know I can do hard things. And I know WHO and WHOSE I am. Thank you, God.